To maintain the privacy of the individuals I have changed all the names of the people mentioned in this post.
I belong to a gaming group that plays Dungeons and Dragons. Now the first thing you know about D&D players is that they often don't have girlfriends. Well in this group they all have girlfriends - and two of the gamers are women and dating the other gamers.
The group is...
Genevieve, who is dating Peter and close friends with Angela.
Peter, who is the guy running the game and works as a doctor.
Angela, who is dating Locke, and a bit naive.
Locke, who is very overweight and very insecure about his relationship with Angela.
Plus me and three other guys, all of which have girlfriends.
As the group dynamic goes I am the jock of the group. I work as a personal trainer, and while I play D&D I am basically leaps ahead of the common nerd with respect to my weight and musculature. Basically I am a fitness nerd who can quote you how many calories activities burn depending on your weight.
Thus it was when I first joined this group that Locke immediately hated me and made a rude comment within he first two minutes of shaking his hand.
Why?! Because he sees me as a threat who might steal away his girlfriend. A girlfriend who is much more attractive than he is physically, but he manages to control her somewhat due to her naivete and his domineering personality.
Now I know she is atttactive, but just because a person is attractive doesn't mean someone else is automatically attracted to them. For my part I have known Angela since 2004 and in the last 9 years she has gained some weight, lost some of her attractiveness and while I might have been interested in her 9 years ago I am no longer interested in her. To me she is now "one of he guys".
But to Locke I am still a threat. To the point of jealousy and delusions.
Since joining the group last Winter he has sent me two ranting emails trying to intimidate me into quitting the group. He makes up such things like I slow the game down (completely untrue), that everyone else hates me (if that was true why is he the only one complaining?), and similar ridiculous claims.
Basically it is the kind of angry rants people tend to write late at night when they're feeling more paranoid than usual and their blood sugar levels are wonky.
Recently Locke decided to quit the group and pressured his girlfriend to quit too. This was followed by his most recent ranting temper tantrum email wherein he complains about me and tries to convince others I am a danger to the group.
In other words, he is making mountain ranges out of molehills so small that only a delusional person can see them.
I am no more a threat to the group than the plastic miniatures on the gaming table.
But I am a threat because he is worried might steal his girlfriend. She has to toe the line of his jealousy and delusions otherwise he will get really upset. And she is a bit too naive and he is too domineering for that to change.
Seriously. Jealousy is like a form of insanity. Even when there is nothing there a person with insane jealousy can turn into an obsessive maniac.
I find the whole thing petty and yet funny. He lacks confidence in himself and is so insecure he sees every man who is more attractive than him as a potential rival for her affections. And he then goes to insane extremes and makes ridiculous statements based on his paranoid delusions.
And that frankly, is both hilarious and pitiful.
Fortunately not all nerds are as insecure and problematic as Locke is. Some of them, like the characters from the Big Bang Theory, can actually get girlfriends and have successful relationships.
But I admit that for the hardcore nerds - especially ones who are overweight and mentally off their rocker, it is pretty freaking rare.
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